程序员的幽默（ID：humor1024）整理
老衲不请自来，
给大家献上一波神注释
供施主们娱乐娱乐
0.
/*
* Dear Maintainer
*
* Once you are done trying to ‘optimize’ this routine,
* and you have realized what a terrible mistake that was,
* please increment the following counter as a warning
* to the next guy.
*
* total_hours_wasted_here = 73
*亲爱的维护者
如果尝试对这段程序进行优化
并且您已经意识到这是一个多么可怕的错误，
请增加以下计数器的个数用来对后来人进行警告
这里总共浪费的时间= 73
1.
Exception up = new Exception("Something is really wrong.");
throw up; //ha ha
例外=新的异常("确实有问题。")
放弃; //哈哈
// When I wrote this, only God and I understood what I was doing
// Now, God only knows
当我写下这个的时候，只有上帝和我明白我在做什么
现在，只有上帝知道
3.
// sometimes I believe compiler ignores all my comments
有时，我会相信编译器会忽略我所有的注释
// I dedicate all this code, all my work, to my wife, Darlene,
// who will have to support me and our three children and
// the dog once it gets released into the public.
谨以此代码，献给我的妻子达琳，感谢她一直着我，以及我的三个孩子和一条狗。
5.
// drunk, fix later
喝多了，改天再修
6.
// Magic. Do not touch.
魔法！不要碰。
7.
// Im sorry.
抱歉。
8.
return 1; # returns 1
返回 1；# 返回 1
9.
Catch (Exception e) {
//who cares?
}
捕获(异常e)
谁在乎？
10.
/**
* Always returns true.
*/
public boolean isAvailable {
return false;
}
代码返回 false ，注释则始终返回 true
11.
/*
* You may think you know what the following code does.
* But you dont. Trust me.
* Fiddle with it, and youll sp many a sleepless
* night cursing the moment you thought youd be clever
* enough to "optimize" the code below.
* Now close this file and go play with something else.
*/
你可能相信你能看懂以下代码，
但是其实绝对不可能，相信我。
一旦你调试了，你绝对会后悔装聪明去尝试优化这段代码。
最好的方式是关闭文件，
去玩点儿你喜欢的东西吧！
12.
try {
} finally { // should never happen
}
绝对不会运行到这里
13.
const int TEN=10; // As if the value of 10 will fluctuate...
好像 10 的值会波动...
14.
// This code sucks, you know it and I know it.
// Move on and call me an idiot later.
这段代码的确很烂，我知道你也知道，
先不要骂我，请先接着往下看
15.
// If this comment is removed the program will blow up
如果删了此处注释，程序就炸了
16.
// I am not responsible of this code.
// They made me write it, against my will.
我不负责这个代码
他们强迫我写，违背了我的意愿。
17.
/* Please work */
请工作
18.
// no comments for you
// it was hard to write
// so it should be hard to read
没有注释，
很难写，
所以它应该很难阅读
19.
options.BatchSize = 300; //Madness? THIS IS SPARTA!
疯了吧？这是斯巴达！
20.
// If this code works, it was written by Paul DiLascia.
// If not, I dont know who wrote it
如果这个代码能够正常工作，那么是Paul DiLascia写的
否则，我也不知道是谁写的
21.
// Peter wrote this, nobody knows what it does, dont change it!
这是彼得写的，没人知道它是做什么的，别改动！
22.
/** Logger */
private Logger logger = Logger.getLogger;
不管怎么费尽心力，人会受伤的时候就会受伤。by 村上春树
23.
// I have to find a better job
我必须找到更好的工作
24.
// Real programmers don’t comment their code.
// If it was hard to write,
// it should be hard to understand.
真正的程序员不注释他们的代码。
如果很难写
应该是难以理解
25.
// This is black magic
// from
// *Some stackoverlow link
// Don’t play with magic, it can BITE.
这是来自stackoverlow的黑魔法
别玩魔法，它会咬人的
26.
// For the sins I am about to commit, may James Gosling forgive me
对于我即将犯下的罪行，希望詹姆斯·高斯林(James Gosling)能原谅我
27.
// Comment this later
稍后对此注释
28.
// Remove this if you wanna be fired
如果你想被炒鱿鱼，就删除它
29.
}catch(Exception ex){
// Houston, we have a problem
}
Houston，我们有一个问题
30.
// I can’t pide with zero, so I have to pide with something very similar
result = number / 0.00000000000001.
我不能除以0，所以我要除以一个非常相似的数
31.
int getRandomNumber
{
Return 4; // chosen by fair dice roll.
// guaranteed to be random.
}
通过公平掷骰子选择
保证是随机的
32.
#TODO: Figure out what I’m doing here and comment accordingly.
弄清楚这里做什么并相应地添加注释
33.
// If this code is still being used when it stops working, then
// you have my permission to shoot me. Oh, you wont be able
// to - Ill be dead...
如果这段代码停止工作时还在使用，
杀了我吧，哦~你不能这么做
我死了......
34.
// If you are reading this, that means you have been put in charge of my previous project.
// I am sorry, so sorry for you. Godspeed.
如果你看到了这里，这意味着你已经被任命为我之前的项目的负责人。
对不起，真抱歉。祝你好运。
35.
// I wrote this while drunk, I don’t know what it does,
// but if you remove it the program breaks.
我是在喝醉的时候写的，所以不知道它是干什么用的
但如果你删除它，程序就会中断
36.
// This code worked before, but my cat decided to take a
// trip across my keyboard...
这段代码以前是有效的，但是我的猫决定在我的键盘上跑一趟
37.
long long ago; /* in a galaxy far far away */
在很远很远的银河系外 （这段代码能运行，绝对是个奇迹）
38.
long john; // silver
金银岛
39.
#define TRUE FALSE // Happy debugging suckers
快乐的去调试你的代码吧，哈哈
40.
// Dear future me. Please forgive me.
// I cant even begin to express how sorry I am.
未来亲爱的我，请原谅我
我说不出来我有多抱歉
41.
// private instance variable for storing age
public static int age;
用于存储年龄的私有实例变量
42.
// I am not sure why this works but it fixes the problem.
虽然我不知道为什么这样管用，但它却是修复了问题
43.
last = first; /* Biblical reference */
最后即是开始，圣经引用
44.
try {
} catch (SQLException ex) {
// Basically, without saying too much, youre screwed. Royally and totally.
} catch(Exception ex)
{
//If you thought you were screwed before, boy have I news for you!!!
}
不用多说，基本上你完蛋了
45.
// John! If youll svn remove this once more,
// Ill shut you, for Gods sake!
// That piece of code is not "something strange"!
// That is THE AUTH VALIDATION.
如果你再删除一次
看在上帝的份上，我要关闭你
这段代码不是什么“奇怪的东西”
那就是身份验证
46.
long time; /* know C */
过来很久时间才知道
47.
// Abandon all hope ye who enter beyond this point
入此门者了断希望
48.
/* Ah ah ah! Youll never understand why this one works. */
啊啊啊！你永远都不会明白为什么这个方法有效
49.
catch (Ex as Exception) {
// oh crap, we should do something.
}
糟糕，我们应该做点什么
50.
// TODO make this work
用TODO做这件事
51.
// If youre reading this, then my program is probably a success
如果你现在在认真详细的阅读这段代码，那么写的这段代码应该是没有问题的
52.
// set break point here - youll never reach it
在这里设置断点-你永远作不到十全十美
53.
/*
** The author disclaims copyright to this source code.
** In place of a legal notice, here is a blessing:
**
** May you do good and not evil.
** May you find forgiveness for yourself and forgive others.
** May you share freely, never taking more than you give.
*/
作者放弃此源代码的版权
这是一份祝福，而不是法律通知
愿你行善不作恶。
愿你宽恕自己，宽恕他人
愿你自由分享，永远不要超过付出
54.
// Im not sure what I did
我不确定我做了什么
55.
// This is crap code but its 3 a.m. and I need to get this working.
这是垃圾代码，但现在是凌晨3点，我需要让他能够正常运行
